Not a Name
by Doctah Sawbones
Summary: John has no surname, but he has a friend that he trusts, and many more that can support him along the way. Tears and violence will ensue.
1. Chapter 1

It started in grade three, I was the only kid in the school with no last name, only a first and middle name. I was laughed at, not surprisingly, even bullied and I had none but one friend, he had a last name, but he didn't have a middle name, his name was Damien Marten, he is French Canadian, also, he has glasses. My name that I know of, is John Scott. We were the only kids in the school to have only two names altogether.

In grade six it was worse, I was getting my Gameboy from my locker, and I grabbed my Pokémon game to go with it, and I joined Damien at an empty group of desks in the corner of the classroom for recess when we heard a sneer from several desks in front of us. "Why don't you nerdy dweebs come play some full-contact soccer?" "What if we don't want to?" Damien replied in his kinda thick French accent. "Then this soccer ball makes full contact with your face!" The kid (his name is Samuel)states as he holds up the ball menacingly. "Bite me!" Damien snarls sticking out his chin. When Samuel throws the ball at him, it makes solid contact with his nose, smashing his glasses lenses, and denting the frame. "Vous avez cassé mes lunettes, trou du cul!" "Why don't you speak English, Loser?" "Samuel, stop, you might end up in the hospital if your not careful." I state, folding my arms, when I look at Damien, his eyes look like they're going to combust any second, and that fire might burn Samuel. Then another kid pipes in. "Why don't y'all get along, we don't need no unpractical bloodshed in this here classroom." It's the reeeeeeally smart kid, what's his name? Something-Clark-Conagher. Oh yeah, his name's Joe. Apparently his father has 11 PhDs, a brainiac indeed. Also, he always wears this weird rubber glove on his right hand, not sure why, but he does. Samuel then turned to him and frowned, then he picked up the ball, careful to avoid the shards of glass, and cocks his arm to throw the ball at Joe, and when he does, the ball is popped just before it hits him. That's when I noticed the glove on his hand is holding the remains of the ball. Samuel gapes at the ball, then at Joe, then he runs to his group of friends to tell them what he saw. We can hear him whispering from here. "The weird smart guy just caught the ball I threw at him and POW! it popped!" Then he gabbered some other words we couldn't hear. We weren't interrupted for the rest of the day.

The next day, we caught news of a new kid, from Turkey or something. Something European. When the day started, the kid was introduced to us, his name was Albrecht Viktor Klauss. You could see him visibly shaking, and Damien and I were at the back! "H-hello. I a-am Albrecht. I am f-from Germany." He stammered. Samuel stood up, and threw a piece of balled paper at Albrecht. "GO BACK TO GERMANY, YOU NAZI!" The instant he said that, everyone went crazy, except Joe, Damien, one bulky Russian kid, and me. Me and Damien just glared at Samuel, and Joe just absentmindedly stared at Albrecht. The Russian kid, wasn't his name Aleksandr? Pointed at Albrecht and pointed at the single empty desk behind Joe, beside me, and next to Aleksandr as well. "You come sit here, small kid."

At grade nine, the five of us were still in the same classes, except Aleksandr had taken all sporty type routes, Albrecht went in Biology and was helping out the school nurse once in a while, Joe was in all the physics and engineering classes. Damien got really good at all the core subjects, and I was in track and field. At one point, Samuel deliberately hit me in the head the day we did shot-put, and I went to the hospital with possible brain damage. Luckily, Samuel was suspended for deliberate harm of a classmate, so he was one less problem to deal with. Anyway, back to the hospital thing. I barely escaped brain damage, but I was now left handed. That might cause issues, and sometimes, when violence happens, I go partially insane, losing my memory and causing a lot of damage.

At around grade 12, Damien, Aleksandr, Albrecht, and I, were falsely accused of murder, and we had to escape the locked down school, but for some reason, Joe helped us. He even had plans for the school layout. We took some of the vents leading out of the bathrooms, and smashed the outer wall vent covers. At this point, we were exposed to the hot New Mexican summer sun, unsure what to do. So we took Joe's truck and Damien's car. Me, Albrecht and Aleksandr failed our drivers tests so we didn't have licenses. Albrecht and Aleksandr went with Joe, so I opted to go with Damien. Since Damien was my way to school anyway, I had a whole crap ton of scrap material in his car, and under all of that, a shotgun. Something peculiar happened on the way, I was eating a sandwich I had made myself for lunch that day, when I dropped it on a random shard of metal. When I went to pick it up, Damien hit a pothole, and I smushed the sandwich into the metal. Went I removed my hand, there was a perfectly blue-rare steak. And to be honest, I just wanted to take a bite. But we heard sirens behind us, and there was a police officer aiming a pistol at us from their vehicles passenger seat. I pulled out the shotgun and took a bite of the steak, then the gun started glowing a pale yellow. When I shot at the policeman, several of the bullets hit him, and he flew backwards.

In Joe's truckbox, next to us, I saw Joe pull out a comically large wrench, and smack a red toolbox. The something weird happened, the box broke open, and a cylindrical object came out, and built itself into a turret of some sort, and it started shooting at the police cars. I then saw Joe pull what looked like a radio out of his pocket, and the speakers in the car started spewing static. Then they cleared. "We need to form a roadblock with our vehicles!" Joe yelled into the radio.

Damien swerved sideways, and the front bumpers of the two vehicles collided, and they screeched to a halt, with the turret still shooting at the police. We jumped out of the vehicles and hid behind them. I pull out my shotgun and put the steak in my pocket.

Behind us, Albrecht was performing an emergency surgery on Aleksandr, to remove the bullet that had been shot into his arm. After the bullet was removed, Albrecht put a needle with a reddish glowing serum in it, into Aleksandr's arm. The wound closed up instantly. When I grabbed my shotgun, and took another bite of the steak, I realized that there weren't any bite marks in the steak anymore. I saw some scrap on the ground, and tried something. When I smashed the steak and the metal together, I got a weird shotgun with a barrel and tons of ammo. I loaded four shots into it and aimed then; BLAMBLAMBLAMBLAM! All four shots fired within half a second. I went to pass my old shotgun to Damien, but he was gone, then I saw him behind a police man, when the man collapsed, dead. So I instead passed the shotgun to Aleksandr.

Within the next hour, we had cleared out most of the police. And they were retreating. But there was a helicopter in the sky. Albrecht pulled a crossbow out of his backpack, and found a peculiar looking bolt. He aimed with precision, and sent the bolt right through the front window of the helicopter. BOOM! The bolt exploded. The helicopter came spiraling down, until it crashed into the street, in a heaping pile of metal. Aleksandr walked up to it, and pulled one of the guns off the side, and took it like a Minigun. Albrecht pulled some pipes off of the helicopter with Aleksandr's help, and found a tank as well. He did some wiring, and took a valve and created something he called a medigun. He took some of the red serum from his backpack, and put the tank in the pack, and put the serum in the tank. When he trains the beam on someone, they miraculously heal.

We got Joe's truck running again, with the sentry in back, and most of my scrap metal behind it. I was in the truckbox trying to make things out of the metal. I stopped when I got another steak, along with a sandwich. I also got some weird watch and some more refined version of the medigun. I passed the watch to Damien, and gave the new medigun to Albrecht. I gave the sandwich to Aleksandr, and he seemed really excited about it. "Hey Joe, where are we going?" I asked. "To where mah dad works, he should be there now. Mehbe."

One time, when I looked into the truck, Damien was missing. I couldn't see him at all, then suddenly, he's there again! After a few hours of driving, we have to stop at a gas station. There is a TV in there showing the news, where a reporter is talking about a huge scene with 5 teens who killed more than a hundred police, and escaped the scene in a pickup truck with a weird mechanism in the back. The store clerk, who had been watching the news, looked at us,the looked outside to our vehicle, and gaped at us, he then reached for the phone, but Joe pulled out a weird device with a handle and a joystick, and a red laser trained itself on the clerk's head.

"Don't try calling the police, we killed most of em. We're here for gasoline, and we will pay for it too, and maybe a tip to shut you up." The clerk just nodded and held out his hand for the money. "W-which pump, sir?" "Number three, please and thanks." Joe replied, and then put two hundreds in the clerk's hand.

We filled up our tank, and left. We continued driving through the badlands, and then we reached the town of Teufort. At this point, Damien was driving, and Joe was playing his guitar. We drove right through Teufort, on to a river to a fenced off area that was all dark, there was nobody here. "I guess mah father's not here right now." Joe muttered. We climbed the fence and wandered through the area... The weird part is, the bridge isn't coloured, but one side is red and brown, while the other is blue and grey, and there are RED and BLU posters everywhere for a bring your kids to work day, happening August 27th, wait it's the 25th right now... They're going to be back in two days! We went into the RED side of the base to bunk down for two days, and all the rooms had names on them... Scout, Soldier, Pyro, Demolitionist, Heavy Weaponry, Engineer, Medic, Sniper, Spy. There was also a medibay and workshop, for the Medic and Engineer I suppose. Aleksandr bunked in the Heavy Weaponry room, because it reminded him of his bedroom, Albrecht went to the medibay because he wanted to see what medical equipment there was, Joe went to the workshop because his sentry had been damaged very badly, and Damien went to the smoke room to have a cigarette. I wandered the rooms looking for a suitable place to crash, when I found the perfect room, the soldier's room, but there was a picture on the bedside table, and the woman seems familiar, but I cannot place it in my memory, all I see in the memory is a bright smile and quiet whispers. I fall asleep until 1:00 the next day when Damien walks into the room and slaps me awake. "Wha-" "Shhhhh! Someone is here!" I look out the window to see a well polished, old fashioned kind of guy, who looks to be in his forties, walk up to the door, and walks in. We close our door quietly, and he walks past, right into the medibay. "ALBRECHT! VHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE! Yelled a very German voice. "You work here dad?" "Yes, I do, and you worried me sick when you went missing!" This guy was Albrecht's dad? Weird. "I'm not alone here either, Joe is in the workshop." "Engineer's son? Vhat is going on here today?" We opened the door quietly, and tried to sneak out, when; "Vho are you two, hmm? Shall I make test subjects out of you?" "Non, monsieur, we are leaving now." "I do not szink so. You shall stay here until the rest of the team comes tomorrow, und ve vill decide vhat to do wisz you." He then walked over, and dragged us by the collars of our shirts, into the medibay. "You vill not leave this room without my permission. I will bring a deck of cards or someszing to keep you occupied. The baszroom is over zhere." He walked over to his desk and pulled out a deck of cards, and walked back. "Do you two know how to play Blackjack?"

When we woke up the next day, we heard a door slam really hard, then heavy footsteps walked over to the medibay. The door opened and a large man resembling Aleksandr looked in. "How you Dok- why is babies in room Doktor?" "I am fine, zhey are intruders, and zhere is somevone on your room." "Leetle baby man is in Heavies room? I will kill them, and kill them, and kill them." He walked out, and over to his room, swiftly opened the door, and froze. He wasn't expecting Aleksandr obviously. "Pochemu ty zdes' , Aleksandr?" "YA beglets ot zakona."

The next person to come in, or randomly appear in this case, was the Spy. He appeared in the room in front of us, and pointed his revolver at us, until he saw Damien, then he holstered the gun and pulled off the mask. "Je suis désolé , mon fils." "Père?" "Indeed, I was a very bad father, Damien."

We heard two people talking outside during a game of Durak with Heavy, Medic, Albrecht, Aleksandr, and I. And there was a deep voice, and a younger sounding voice, and they were Australian, and they systematically searched the base, leaving the medibay and workshop for last, there was nobody in the workshop, and he opened the medibay doors to see five figures playing a game of cards. "Ello mates, did any of you blokes bring kids?" "Non, they were here already." Said Spy, appearing in the corner, his son to his right. "Roight, well, meet my son, Nathaniel Mundy." The kid was lanky to say the least. He was at least six feet tall.

A few minutes later we ended up playing a game of Slaps with sandwiches and snakes, every time there was a slap, either Sniper or Nathaniel got it, and Heavy always got his cards snaked by either Spy or Damien. Medic and Albrecht always got the sandwiches. Me and Joe managed to get two aces between the two of us, and we were the last ones in, until Nathaniel slapped one of each of our aces, and eventually won the game. At that point, another person walked in, and it must have been Engineer because Joe ran up to him and hugged him, and they left to go to the workshop. Demoman came in next, with his daughter, who took the bottle of alcohol he grabbed away from him, and threw it out, to Demoman's dismay. "You ain't drinkin' until I ain't here, kay Father?" "Oh all right. Not even a sip of my scrumpy?" "No." Her name is Samantha Marie Tavish.

We heard the scout way before he got in the room, he was arguing with his daughter about who the best baseball player was. At this point, we all had moved to the common room, to have more space. The second last person to arrive was Soldier, who yelled like a maniac almost constantly.

Everyone was here, so here came the scrutiny. I was the intruder with no parents here. "Ve have vone problem here kinder, and dummkopfs, zhere is an intruder here. John is alone, so vhat vill we do wisz him?" "Attention! There is a ceasefire for the next three weeks. For the adults anyway. The teenagers will be connected to respawn and will be fighting for the entire last two thirds of the ceasefire, train them for the first week!" The woman's words came through the intercom. "Vell... zhere is zhe answer to our problem." "I WILL TRAIN HIM TO BE THE ULTIMATE SOLDIER!" "Hudda mmph!" "Mmph!" I was suddenly given a bear hug by two people in fireproof suits. When the entire ordeal was over, I crashed on a blanket in Soldier's room.

At precisely six in the morning, Soldier woke me up and told me to follow him, so I grabbed my shotgun and my steak, and followed him to the shooting range. He told me, that I would shoot the targets until I could hit every one in his 40 level challenge. I did the challenge to start, and made it to level 27 before I missed a shot. "Not bad... But you would still be dead afterwards." After that, he got me a rocket launcher, and a shovel, and I did the challenge differently this time, I would shovel the targets right in front of me, shotgun the targets in the middle, and rocket launcher the ones in the back. This time, I made it to level 36. "Better, definitely better, but you would still be dead, and we want you to be great!" He then provided me with the challenge to dodge a sentry until I could destroy it. I got a rocket launcher with 2 rockets, and 2 more rockets to destroy the sentry. When the sentry powered up, I shot at the guns shooting at me, and stopped them from functioning, then I loaded one rocket into the launcher, jumped just as the sentry shot rockets at me, and I flew into the air, reloading the last rocket, BLAM! BLAM! sentry destroyed. "Not bad for your first time, I must say. Let's do the challenge one last time." I completed level 40, and Soldier nodded. "Good job, you destroyed four sentries, mangled 70 stationary targets, and 35 moving ones. Now for the next course." We moved to the bottom of a high cliff. "How am I going to get up there?" Soldier asks me. "I have no clue." "Like this." He pulls out his rocket launcher, and shoots a rocket at his feet, launching himself to the top of the cliff. "NOW YOU TRY IT!" I aimed the rocket launcher at my feet, BOOM! I flew to the top of the cliff, no problem. "Ok, now we don't have to do the rocket jumping course, you already have what it takes." We then go back to the base and go to bed.

He didn't wake me up today, weird. Oh wait, it's 5 in the morning. But he's not in bed... Where is he? Then I detected the smell of bacon and eggs. I hopped out of bed and dressed myself. Once I got to the kitchen, I saw Soldier cooking some bacon and eggs. Delicious. "C'mere, unless you want to starve, you are going to learn to make food." "Ok, I guess..." We went through the process of making ourselves breakfast. "You are an entire day ahead of the rest of your teammates, so you have the day to do whatever you want, and you will do partner training tomorrow. So that day I watched people, training with their parents. Sniper was teaching Nathaniel how to hold the sniper rifle steady, Spy was teaching Damien how to backstab, Heavy was teaching Aleksandr how to spin up the minigun and how to punch really hard, Demo was teaching Samantha trajectories on the grenade launcher, Pyro was reading children's books with L'il Pyro, Engineer and Joe were talking about mechanics, and Scout was teaching his daughter Natalie, how to pitch a baseball. I assume that Medic was teaching Albrecht about medicine. By the time I figured all of that out, it was time to crash.

The next day, Soldier woke me up at six again to go train. We saw some people along the way there, and they were all mumbly-grumbly. My first duel would be with L'il Pyro. I was told to choose a loadout, so I chose the normal Rocket Launcher, the Mantreads, and the Market Gardener.

"Three, Two, One, FIGHT!"

I shot a rocket at my opponent, but they just reflected it back at me, so I jumped, and soared through the air, to land on their head, and smash them with the shovel. Their body was picked up by respawn, so I won the duel.

The next duel was with Natalie, she picked the Sandman, the Flying Guillotine, and the Scattergun. I chose the Shovel, my Shotgun, and the Direct Hit.

"Three, Two, One, FIGHT!"

She shot a baseball at me, but I deflected it with the shovel, and shot a rocket at her, the small explosion did small damage to her, but it hindered her movement, so I pulled out my shotgun, and loaded three shells into it, BLAMBLAMBLAM! her head was gone. I won again.

I fought with Joe next, and he had the default loadout, so I did too.

"Three, Two, One, FIGHT!"

He had a small sentry up, so I shot a rocket at it and destroyed it. I pulled out the default shotgun and we had a shotgun duel. I prevailed because my aim was better, I got him blown to pieces. Done and dealt with.

I watched five fights;

Demo vs. Sniper winner: Demo, decapitation

Demo vs. Spy winner: Spy, stabbed

Spy vs. Medic winner: Medic, bonesawed

Medic vs. Heavy winner: Medic, taunt kill

So I was fighting Medic

I chose the Black Box with my shotgun and the Market Gardener.

"Three, Two, One, FIGHT!"

I tried to get him with rockets, but he's too fast, so I pull out my shotgun, load up four shots, BLAMBLAMBLAMBLAM! I left his leg in shards, so I rocket jumped, and shoved the shovel through his head, and his body was taken by respawn. I won! And then went to bed!

The next day, I woke up to find a crate with a chain on my blanket next to me, and a key on my lap. I take the key, and open the lock on the chain, and open the crate. Inside is a black helmet like Soldier's, with three stars on it, and a Rocket Launcher painted a drippy looking snot-green, and I love it! I test it out later that day, and the rockets it shoots are green! Another thing I found in the crate was a name tag, I'm calling it the Snot-Rocket!

Since there was nothing to do for four days, I wandered around the map for a while, exploring the place, and figuring out strategies, until I went to the lower resupply area by our intelligence, and heard weird eerie music. I pulled out my Snot-Rocket and walked in. There was a Soldier grappling with a Demoman, until the Demo, uhh... Burped a grenade at the Soldier, who then made shotgun cocking noises and swiftly moved to retaliate. I backed out of there at rocket speed. I went back in the base, searching for Soldier. I found him in his room, sitting on the bed. "What are you doing, Soldier?" "Remembering the deceased." "Who is it?" "My wife, Sally Marie Doe. We were so happy. We had a child, but I couldn't be with him because of my job, his name was John. Then she died... She... She was in a car crash... She was in the middle of a bus... And a car hit the middle of the bus... John barely made it out alive... He was sent to an orphanage to be taken care of... I could never find him..." He was crying, remembering all of the things that happened to his wife and child... Yet, there was something in the back of my mind... "What was the child's full name?" "John Scott Doe." I was shocked, I was this man's son, but neither of us knew. "I think I am your son." "What? This doesn't make sense." "I didn't know my last name, but I knew John Scott, and I can't remember my mother properly, so she would have died while I was young." He thought about it for several minutes. "How can we confirm it though?" "DNA maybe? Medic might be able to help." He thought to himself for a minute or so more. "Let's go have a chat with Medic."

Medic took blood from both our arms, and analyzed it under a microscope. "Your DNA samples are a match, you are related."

I didn't sleep last night. I am bone tired today. Soldier got me out of bed at six again. "Morning, son." "Mornin' father." The word felt... Unusual on my tongue, like a different language. Luckily the battles didn't start for three days yet. I had several cups of coffee with my apple for breakfast today. Today we would be meeting the BLU team out on the bridge.

We were lined up on the bridge, BLU on one side, RED on the other. The real shocker was the fact that Samuel was the BLU heavy today. Good thing Damien wears contacts now. My counterpart sneered at me and spit on my feet. Good thing those feet would kick his ass. We were told to interact with our counterpart for the rest of the day. Me and my counterpart arm wrestled next to Samuel and Aleksandr. The problem was, I was left handed, but my counterpart was right handed, so, during matches, I would devastatingly lose right handed battles, and win left handed ones by a landslide. I also found out that my counterpart goes at things with a ferocity, and doesn't think it through. So when we played chess, he ended up flipping the table. Between Aleksandr and Samuel, Aleksander is stronger, and waaaaaaaaay smarter. After the table flip incident, me and my counterpart butted heads, our helmets making solid contact.

I slept through Saturday, so... Yeah... On Sunday, the entire team got together for team of two family go-fish 18 person madness cards and things yeah! Then we set up Damien's Nintendo gaming system on the TV, and did Dr. Mario battles. "THESE GERMS ARE ANTI AMERICAN!"

Battle day already.

We were lined up in resupply, waiting for the countdown to end.

TEN

NINE

EIGHT

SEVEN

SIX

FIVE

FOUR

THREE

TWO

ONE

FIGHT!

I charged out of the door, and rocket jumped off the battlements and smashed my Mantreads into the RED Sniper's face, and Market Gardened the RED Medic. Samuel charged at me, but I did a sissy jump and Market Gardened him. Next thing I knew, I was in excruciating pain, and I landed on resupply floor. "My god... That is excruciating."

"YOU HAVE TAKEN THE ENEMY INTELLIGENCE!"

I looked up, and ran to the front lines. Here's what happened, in precise order:

Natalie ran out of the BLU base with the Intel

Samuel followed

I rocket jumped

Nathaniel shot his counterpart

Samantha gibbed my counterpart

I landed on Samuel

My shovel landed a meaty smack on his head

He died

Natalie captured the intelligence

"YOU HAVE CAPTURED THE ENEMY INTELLIGENCE!"

We have another battle just like today's, tomorrow.

-Next Week-

We are all on a train, heading to a new location. Apparently it's called Dustbowl. When we get off the train, we hear gunshots and yelling, and I see a skinny white guy run past us. "HEY! THIS IS LIKE TEAM FORTRESS 2!" "PILLS!" And a black guy runs after him.

"The robots are invading! Force them back!" Yells the Administrator.


	2. Notice to Loyal Readers

**Hello everyone! I decided to get off my fat behind, and start writing Fanfics like books, with real chapters and whatnot. I will be trying to work and upload whenever I can, and the next book of both Lost and Not a Name is in the works. As compared to some people, I will be uploading the chapters as I write them. Let's hope General Facepalm doesn't enter the battle! School is starting soon unfortunately, so my progress might be hindered a bit. (Don't tell the Language Arts teacher that I was writing and sleeping in class!)**


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